Wednesday, February 3, 2016

How Can I Convince My Husband...

I often get callers to the Electric Forester EMR Advice Line (01591 610167) who say desperate things like “How can I convince my husband* the wireless devices in our home are making my life a misery?” It’s a variation on the theme “How can I get my partner to stop polluting my living space with his cigarette smoke?” and the fundamental issue is just the same.

New information is the place to start. When people gain new knowledge they did not have before, it opens up the opportunity for them to change their attitude without losing face. Change the environment and it becomes easier to change behaviour.

There is masses of information now available on-line about the dangers of man-made electromagnetic radiation but some of it is heavily spun by vested interests and you may have to read between the lines to discern the truth. For every argument there is a counter-argument. Where to start? What is beyond dispute is your first-hand experience of what is going on inside your own body. But is man-made EMR the cause? Investigation and experimentation may provide the answer. Sometimes this is as simple as feeling better after a few days away from home.

Some good places to start understanding other people’s challenges are: - this blog

A comprehensive EMR survey may provide insights into EMR exposure and a post-survey consultation and custom-written property-specific report may be sufficient to convince your partner of the need for, and virtue of, a Precautionary Approach to man-made EMR in line with Government recommendations. - Professional domestic and commercial EMR Surveys - since 2006.

In extreme cases, protective clothing may be beneficial and EMR shielding could be necessary, particularly in bedrooms where the body spends much time repairing the damage of the waking day.

If new information, professional advice and protection measures do not achieve the desired results, you could  brush up on your assertiveness skills and learn the art of effective negotiation. Your health and well-being, and that of your children and pets if you have any, are at stake. You could of course try appealing to your partner’s better nature and self-interests if you’ve not tried that tack before. You may even consider resorting to bribery or blackmail but that may not get you what you ultimately want, and this is the key - Respect.  It seems people in general, and men in particular, cannot imagine any harm coming from their favourite toys and sometimes neighbours too can feel threatened and be unwilling to understand or be willing to accommodate other’s needs.  You may find the word ‘respect’ unusual in a blog post about EHS but it is central to getting an outcome that will endure. Respect is one of life’s double-edged-swords - if you demand it you have to be willing to give it. If none of the above is getting you anywhere, you might consider taking unilateral action - after all, it’s your home too. Serious situations justify firm and resolute action.

1. Buy a new corded speakerphone and throw the DECT Cordless away (don’t inflict its toxic always-on emissions on anyone else by giving it away or selling it). Have a wired telephone extension socket installed first if necessary.

2. If your neighbours’ cordless phones are adding to your EMR burden, consider paying for an extension-socket to be installed in their home and buy them a corded phone (provided they agree to ditch the DECT). If their DECT base station includes and answer phone, they may be able to get Callminder® or a similar answering service for free.

3. Keep your mobile/tablet/laptop/computer/e-reader/xBox/Wii etc. in Flight Mode (Airplane Mode) when not connected to the Internet. Better still, replace all wireless LAN/network connections with wired alternatives.

4. Turn off routers when not in use and especially at night. Use a time switch if necessary connected to a power strip so that all computer related devices go off at night. You might also buy a time clock and power strip for your neighbours' computer setup.

5. If you’re still not getting anywhere, move out, albeit temporarily. Actions speak louder than words. Go and stay with a friend. A single night away may be all it takes to make your point and for your partner to come to their senses. (They may not appreciate what they’ve got till it’s gone). You may be able to achieve leverage by making your return conditional but you don’t want to end up homeless. If your health and well-being are important to you (and hopefully also to your partner) then resolute action is called for.

If you are successful in significantly reducing your EMR exposure, you may be pleasantly surprised to find that both you and your partner’s lives become easier as sleep and relationships improve.

Note: Three times more women are affected by ES/EHS than men. It is perhaps unsurprising that many men have difficulty appreciating the scope and impact of environmental intolerance to man-made EMR on their partner’s lives. The number of children adversely affected is presently unknown. They have no effective voice or control over their environment, dependant as they are on the knowledge, wisdom and lifestyle choices of their parents or guardians.

*Husband, wife, partner, parents, children, neighbours, boss, fellow residents …


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